Day of Epiphany


EPIPHANY #1:

“I have a Retirement Plan afterall!”

  • continue Life in my FaeriWood TreeHouse, til Vulture’s Time to cross The Emerald Bridge to the Great Beyond…

-then-

  • my preference  would be to be moved to an ‘Assisted Living for the Beautifully Aged’ in a posh ‘Olde World’ English Estate or Castle!

-but-

  • a poor Orphan will get a really good ‘crazy’ going on, and settle for a quality psychiatric facility with good therapists & psych meds!

-although-

  • what will happen in all likelihood, is that I’ll just wander off into the FaeriWood, never to be seen again, unless the forest burns in an inferno or they back-fill the ravine and pave it over to build tract homes….

BEADS, CATS, SHROOMS & FAERI WOOD 031BEADS, CATS, SHROOMS & FAERI WOOD 037BEADS, CATS, SHROOMS & FAERI WOOD 038

-at which time-

  • I’ll be forced to, oh- just pretending now!- murder my good-for-nothing-menace-to-society-as-a-whole (Italian for “asshole”) ex-husband, and convince the jury that I should face life in prison, where I will finally reap the benefits of all my hard-earned tax dollars, and live the last 150 years of my life in luxury at the Purdy Women’s Hilton up north, with ‘3-hots-and-a-cot’, cable TV, free gym membership, free college education (where I will finally achieve my dream to become the first honest lawyer in history –that can be trusted!), not pay another bill, utility or mortgage for the remainder of my days, nor be required to work (unless I fancy stamping out license plates, making leather key fobs to be sold to the general public, take on the landscaping duties of my final resting place), or…. get the idea?

EPIPHANY #2:

  • each morning, I judge the weather (percentage of precipitation, anyway) based on how much of, or whether I even have, a ‘beach’ down at the duck pond when I open my slider door curtain and look down into the FaeriWood…

AUDRI'S RIVER & 5 WINTER FALLS 043

EPIPHANY #3:

  • if chickens are descendants of Tyrannosaurus -Rex * still don’t buy it! *, then ducks are descendants of the Pterrorducktyl or Pooposaurus Rex…

My Inner Duck- Day 2 022

pic of pterrorducktyl

EPIPHANY #4:

  • 5-1/2’ fiberglass woodstove door gasket ‘rope’:                               $10.95
  • tube of fiberglass woodstove door gasket cement:                          $ 4.99
  • 8.9% state sales tax on subtotal:                                                     $ 1.37
  • change back from a 20-dollar bill and not having to set my alarm at 2-hour intervals throughout the night, to keep the good-for-nothing, death-trap of-a-woodstove from going out:                                                                                    PRICELESS!!

*  now, if I can just get ‘firewood guy’ to cut the wood to actually fit inside the door of the woodstove, life would be PERFECT!  *

WOODSTOVE GASKET- PRICELESS 001

EPIPHANY #5:

  • O….M….G:  I…. no-way-to-explain-it…. simply…. A.D.O.R.E…. Hozier!  I mean, their lyrics are all about terminally, unhealthy, co-dependent ‘love’, pagan sex and heroine users (don’t get me wrong- not a damn thing wrong with aforementioned pagan sex!!  Merely a knee-jerk response to a rash of whiny-baby posts on the YouTube vids that were imposed on my viewing pleasure)

hozier lyr church

…but their Sound…!  I have absolutely no control over my body when I hear their music, and It just wants to break out in Dance!!  I am so not kidding about this!  What the hell…?

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