I am not a survivor. I am currently a victim.
I blog becuz I am a coward.
I blog becuz I allowed myself to be isolated.
there’s s’posed to be fringe benefits when you are someone’s “kept woman”. I’m not seeing what they are.
Bondage & Discipline isn’t any fun when there’s no sex involved. it’s just being held captive, at that point.
I would never let a man trap me like this. that definitely was not my problem.
my husband wasn’t a sociopath- he was just a Bully and physically assaulted me. but he didn’t scare me. he was just bigger than me and was only able to catch me off guard in the beginning.
I am Homeless 4 years becuz they said I was “brave”.
I wish I was a coward that day too.
I was blind-sided that:
- I would have a sociopath
- my sociopath would come in the form of 4 women that I trusted
- I would have more than 1 sociopath
- i hafta know what sociopath even means….
apparently, sociopaths are also chameleons.
and it’s possible that the ‘better’ sociopath’s come without peni….
I allowed myself to be vulnerable and at the mercy of a soul pirate whose window dressing is just as cute and adorable as your favorite aunti or gran.
I blog because I am alone.
I blog becuz 1 of my 5 Greatest Fears is Invisibility.
I blog becuz I’m practicing my voice (again).
I blog becuz my sociopath has me so very confused.
I blog becuz I need to hear what others see.
I blog becuz I havent been hugged by a real human being in almost two years, and that was done last by a complete stranger.
I blog so I don’t forget who I was.
I blog becuz I might make it back- if I can hold back invisibilty long enough.
you could say, my blog is like a bookmark or breadcrumbs.
and seriously- if you can still hear me…..
I’m pretty sure I found the remains of Hansel & Gretel in the compost bin.
there is a Metamorphosis for every Dragon & FlutterBy,
a Phoenix for every Fyre,
and a Hell for every Violet….
So within these broken boundaries where my Imagination now does Plays,
used to be a SomeOne-
a One with Some…..
that once could recognize her own reflection
with pure & simple Joy.
But if you’ll wander now, far & long enough amongst the wreckage of a Life-
of scrap to be recycled,
a chance you might just stumble o’er what’s left o’ long-forgotten me
flopped in dust so gentle soft,
whisperin’ quiet to my lastly toy.
“Don’t Blink!” cries the Doctor, or you might just see something …..’Almost~Alice’…..
“Don’t Look!” unless you Dare….